Articles

Margaret came to us in tears. Her husband of thirty years had told her that not only was he leaving her but that he already had an apartment rented. He was gone in under a week. A lifetime of expectations, understandings and commitments were shattered.

Recently there have been some major legislative changes to estates practice in British Columbia. The Wills, Estates and Succession Act, S.B.C. 2009, c. 13("WESA") came into force on March 31, 2014. So what does this mean for separating families?

I have a general Counselling Practice and I also specialize in separation and divorce. I have put together a list of books that I have read and/or referred to in my Collaborative Practice, as well as in my Counselling Practice. I have found these books helpful as have some of my clients who I loan them to.

"Love. It will mess us up every time." This familiar lament was vocalized by a woman in my office last week as she told me about a lifetime of putting her head in the sand and letting other people, including her husband make financial decisions for her.

When I ask clients 'What is the best investment you have ever made?', home owners always answer, 'my home'. Depending on where and when you bought into the housing market, real estate in Vancouver has doubled, tripled and even quadrupled over the last 12 years.

The statistics have been steady for years and years - less than 10% of filed cases make it to trial. That means that even if you start your divorce in the litigation system, the likelihood of actually going to trial is very slim. But when does settlement occur?

(Note to Reader: I am sharing my Professional Opinion after 30 years of Professional Practice as a Mental Health professional. These views are my own. They may or may not be shared by the Professional Colleagues with whom I work.)

You and your partner have decided to end your relationship. You both agree you want to negotiate an agreement in non-adversarial process: neither of you wants to go to court.

If you have been looking at this website thinking "This Collaborative practice sounds great for some people, but you don't know [insert the name of the person with whom you could NEVER collaborate]!", this article is aimed at you. My intent is for you to consider that this person isn't how you think they are.

Although Statistics Canada has not been collecting Canada's annual marriage and divorce rates since 2008, it seems fairly widely accepted that over 40% of Canadian marriages are expected to end in divorce before the couple reach their 50th wedding anniversary.

You and your ex have decided to consider the collaborative approach to divorce. This is commendable, as it is a gigantic hurdle to get to this point of agreement with someone you are in conflict with.

If you have made and accepted that divorce is your only choice, I'm sure this has been one of the most painful, difficult and heart wrenching decisions that you have ever had to make.

Divorce dramatically shifted the path of my life in a way that I could not fathom as I entered and experienced the divorce process. I credit the Collaborative Approach to divorce as the beginning of the path that I am now on to live life with hope.